QbInquirer
Editorial: Project Paperclip
5h4d0w 8/22/2k

I have noticed lately that there is probably some sort of conspiracy against me and it might be related to Qbasic, although I'm not sure. I think if there is a conspiracy against me, it should be called "Project Paperclip". I imagine that's already the name for it. There's alot more to it that the government would kill me for if I told you, so I'll just write here the small stuff. It all started a few weeks ago. Suddenly I get these papers brought to me that ask for money, something about my car or electricity or "insurance". Like I'm stupid enough to fall for that. And then other papers, too, letters from people I never heard of before wanting to know how i am doing. These are probably government agents trying to fool me. And sometimes I get boxes with books, programming books that I don't remember ordering. I'm always suspicious that there is a bomb the US government put in there so I have to throw cocktails at them in my back yard. there's no way i'm going to open them. the guy who brings this stuff tries to be quiet, but I see him. I see everything. Next time I'll be waiting for him with my knife. He won't get away so easily. I have ways of making him talk. i've even had to shoot some people advertising new occults, like Avon or Boy Scouts or Olympia Sales Club, because I knew if I didn't do it first they probably would. but they keep sending more. and then most girls don't seem to like me. i think the government is paying off every last one of them. not that this matters anymore, but i think it has something to do with Project Paperclip. how does this relate to Qbasic, you ask? well the government fears my mediocre programming skills, so they put Project Paperclip up to stop me. the fools.

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